I have always, always wanted to be a stay-at-home-mom. And nothing has made me happier over the past 6 1/2 years than spending all day chasing my three little monsters around the house and cleaning up their messes...really!
But I admit, there have been lots of times that I felt like tearing my hair out. Days that I was so bored out of my mind and all I wanted was some time to myself and adult conversation. My mom was always there to listen to me complain, but she also always pointed out that someday I would miss those days with three toddlers at home.
I knew she was right, but that time seemed so far off in the future. I didn't think it would ever really come.
Well, friends, that time is on the horizon. Tempe is at school every afternoon and Helena goes two afternoons a week. In just six months, Tempe will be gone all day--all day!--and Helena will go to kindergarten every afternoon and Juno and I will be left alone at home, just the two of us.
I can't help but feel sad about that. I dearly love having a house full of kids, making messes, arguing, incessantly whining at my feet. I love when they "help" me clean, reading to them, playing all their childish games, finding fun new projects to do together, coloring pictures, and making special lunches and snacks for them. I love playing in the backyard, going for walks, riding scooters and pushbikes up and down the sidewalk, doing sidewalk chalk on the driveway, "gardening" together, and reading magazines while they play in the wading pool in the backyard. I love taking them to storytime at the library, the zoo, Temple Square, and all of our favorite parks.
I don't want those days to be over. I'm too young for those days to be over. What will I do with my days in a few years when Juno is in school too?
That is the hardest part about accepting that we might not have any more children. I didn't realize how much I would miss life with little ones until it was almost over. So for those of you who will still be having babies over the next few years, do me a favor and let me borrow your kids every once in a while. I promise they'll have fun with me!