Pearl's birth story in photos

* BIG thanks to Margaret for documenting Pearl's birth for us!! *

Little acorn

That little acorn in my blog banner is supposedly "coming soon".
How soon, that is the question!
I am still 10 days away from my due date BUT I have already passed the point at which I had Juno (38+2) and I have never gone past 39 weeks, so I am feeling a little antsy waiting for her.
Add to that the seemingly impossible feat I have of dilating to nearly 6 cm without having any noticeable contractions and it is really feeling like a waiting game! Labor could start at any moment and she could be in my arms just a few hours later!
I'm off to walk to the school, we'll see if that kicks anything into gear :)

37+ weeks!

The countdown is officially on!
I am 37 weeks + 2 days so baby girl really could come any day now. I had Juno at 38+2 (one week from today!) and Tempe and Helena at 39 weeks so I can't help but think she'll come some time late next week or next weekend. Maybe that's wishful thinking, but I am progressing quite a bit and I'm already past the point of progression that I was at my last appointments before going into labor with Tempe and Juno.
The thing is, I feel so comfortable and physically well that I can't imagine going into labor any time soon! At night my back on the left side and my ribs on the right side hurt pretty bad (I guess I just tire myself out during the day) but besides that, really no complaints. I could easily go to my due date except I am so anxious to have my sweet girl in my arms!
(And I said basically the same exact thing at this point in my pregnancy with Juno and then had her 10 days later!)
So, I just have to document the fact that I have not worn a single item of maternity clothes this entire pregnancy. Not one. I've gained 20 pounds and my fundal height is right on track, but I am just really not showing much at all. People are seriously shocked when I tell them my due date. I think I just carry my babies straight up and down and in my ribcage so my belly doesn't stick out much. I've always been small in my pregnancies, but this one is definitely the smallest baby belly. I mean, I am really wearing my regular jeans, still buttoned and everything, just a little bit lower on my waist than normal. But maybe that is just saying something about my pre-pregnancy body...
Clothes are washed and put away, I'm stocked up on diapers, blankets, and burp cloths, the freezer is filling up nicely, and I've gotten back in the baby game by babysitting a cute little six month old three days a week :) Now all I need is the baby!

Fill that freezer!!

I am at that point in my pregnancy (37 weeks!) where the nesting is really kicking into gear because I know baby could be here at any time! I find that I have energy bursts where I get a ton done--and then I crash. So if I start feeling a little bit of extra energy, I jump on it and do as much as I can. I've been trying to do meal prep every day to fill my freezer for after the baby comes. 

Today I made bacon and egg biscuit sandwiches for breakfasts. Mmmm, the biscuits were so big and fluffy, I had to really restrain myself! The only other breakfast foods I have in the freezer are waffles--any other ideas? We eat a lot of quick-cooking oatmeal, toast, and granola for breakfast, but I'm trying to add a little more protein. 

So far, I've got a ton of ham-and-cheese rolls (think homemade hot pockets), taquitos, make your own pizza kits, cornbread muffins, crescent rolls, lasagna rolls, and three kinds of soup. Still on the list is chili and ???? I need to think of just a few more meal ideas to have in there ready to go so I don't have to worry too much about food in the first few weeks.

35 weeks!!!!!!

I've been so bad at documenting this pregnancy. I had really good intentions, because I know this is my last go-round, but I think it's been about 8 weeks since I last took a "belly shot".

Anyway, here I am at 35 weeks! 

35 down, 5 to go (in theory)! I've got my hopes set on having this little girl on Easter Sunday, which is 4 weeks from today and 8 days before my due date. I had Tempe and Helena at 39 weeks and Juno at 38+2, so Easter falls right into my baby-having range. My mom was born on Easter Sunday and I think it would be so sweet if this one would come that day as well!
No huge complaints from me, although Jason might disagree. Baby girl is in my ribs and my ribcage has expanded quite a bit so that's uncomfortable, but par for the course. She's still moving a ton and every once in a while will really hurt me! I haven't had as many contractions as I think I did at this point in other pregnancies, but maybe I'm remembering wrong. I have awful heartburn, although the antacids help a bit. 
The weirdest symptom I have is my darkening skin. Anyone who knows me, knows that I am the whitest person you'll ever meet. I burn, not tan, no matter what, and I really don't care. But suddenly my face is so dark and tan and people have been asking if I've been going to a tanning bed (NO you shouldn't go tanning when you're 8 months pregnant!!!) I have been outside a ton lately because it's nice weather, but no more than I normally do at this time of year. I know pregnancy can make your skin get darker, so I think that's what's happening, although I've never experienced it before.

Oh, hello toes, is that you down there?
I love having a big belly :)

baby gets what baby wants

And sometimes baby (we've been calling her "Bowling Ball" lately) wants some good ol' Ben & Jerry's ice cream and internet nonsense.

#32weeks!

how much longer!

Hey guys
I am so excited to have my baby.
I've got three months and 2+ weeks until she (*squeal!* I love saying she!) gets here so it'll still be a while.
But man, I am so excited.
I'm in that golden stage of pregnancy where I am big enough that people can tell I'm pregnant but not big enough to be super uncomfortable; I can feel baby moving all the time but she's not in my ribs yet. I love it. I love being pregnant and I'm so happy I get to experience it again!
My nesting is starting to set in, but it's manifesting itself in deep cleaning so far. I think I've got all the "gear" covered but I still have to inventory clothes. Of course I will make her a special blanket and I promised the older girls they could each pick out fabric for a burp cloth.
You can never have too many of those!
We try really hard not to name our babies before birth, but I can't help but think of her by a specific name. I want to hold her in my arms just to make sure it's right for her, though. Can't wait to see if it fits!

just a little something

If you're interested, go here for more details!
Sad day... I created the new blog in a hurry and was so excited the address/name I wanted was available. I JUST NOW realized it's because I left the r out of secret :(

here goes

Two weeks ago, I was writing a blog post about our struggle to add to our family. I've mentioned it here and there, but I was really baring my soul. I ended up not publishing the post and then that night, I took a pregnancy test... and it was positive.
Wow, after 14 months and probably 50 negative tests, finally a positive one!
I was ecstatic for six days, but unfortunately, that's as far as that pregnancy made it. I know it was a really early miscarriage (a chemical pregnancy), but to me, it already felt real. I haven't had a miscarriage before and they really suck. I can only be grateful that (physically) it was really easy on me.
And now, a week later, I am feeling hopeful again. Hopeful that because I am young and healthy I will eventually get pregnant again and hold my own little baby in my arms again. I hope it happens.
I know that many, many women experience miscarriages and infertility, but it's such a taboo subject that people don't really talk about it and it can feel really isolating. Now, I talk and share a lot, so I'm breaking my silence on my experience. The last year has been an emotional roller coaster. I want so badly to be able to just relax, enjoy my family, and feel satisfied with what I have now. Then when I someday get pregnant again (because surely I will!), it will be a great surprise and I'll be happy, but I won't waste time worrying about it in the meantime. 
However, that is easier said than done. Working on my family yearbooks has been helpful, as has the old mantra "One day at a time". But I want to know how you do it. How do you move on and find joy when your life turns out differently than you expected? 
Leave a comment or shoot me an email @ keander at gmail dot com!